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This forum offers parents the opportunity to voice their own experiences of international parental child abduction, and related issues, and to share useful information with others in a similar situation.

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Mothers´ Day

by sherrie / Posted 14/03/2010 / Updated 04/05/2010

As a mother who has had her son wrongfully removed, and still waiting for decisions within the court system, I wanted to say "Happy Mothers´ Day" and to remind all mothers out there that even if they do not have their children with them to remember that fighting to get them back is the best thing you can do as a monther - so hang in there!!

God Bless

Responses

From Phil / Posted: 06/04/2010
Hi Sherrie.
Please remember that all of these children have fathers who also love them,and you mothers always need to recognise and respect the fathers rights for then to be invloved in their childrens lives.
We are more than just ´bank accounts´!
From jane / Posted: 24/04/2010
Dear Phil
I have seen your name all over these message boards. I have seen you pop up all over the place with snide comments. I dont know who hurt you so deeply I will tell you this though. Everyone that comes to this site is hurting. Nobody visits this webiste because they are happy. WE ARE ALL IN SOME FORM OF PAIN AND HURT. I am sorry your in so much pain I do not condone your comments, as a woman who has endured domestic violence AND the loss of her son at the hands of an injust judical system. Another parent passing judgment with insenstive comments to others, is compltely inappropriate.
Reunite established this webiste and forum for us all to connect to support not to vent or attack one another.
Please keep that in mind when you feel like taking out your hurt and anger on others.
Sincerely
Jane
From ac / Posted: 04/05/2010
Hi Sherrie
I read your post yesterday and I have to say it haunted me … and more so the comment by Jane. Jane is right that we all visit this site purely because we are unfortunate enough to be without our children and we hurt. We don’t come here to get inspiration for lives … though this site should inspire :o)

Like all the parents on this site I feel for you and the constant loss you must suffer. Time apart from one’s children can never be recaptured. And this sometimes turns people into what they would never imagine of themselves.

Jane, while you have a point I don’t see why the harsh comments. Phil is surely right that children also have fathers. The law is unjust as you say. It is often biased towards women, to whom in most cases custody of children is awarded, and men (I suppose) end up feeling like bank accounts paying for children they want in their daily lives.

People battle over children as if they are like a house or some other material possession to be ‘split’ upon the breakdown of a relationship. And during that madness, and sometimes beyond, children become “my children”, not OURS. Question: is a woman more deserving of being a parent than a man? Should children be carted out of the life of one parent, to the benefit of that parent, to some far off destination leaving the left behind parent angry, hurt and, perhaps, eventually bitter?

To my mind, posts of ‘fighting for children is the best thing that you can do’ is not only provocative but also insensitive regardless of whether you are a mother or a father. We all love our children, mother AND fathers, and for children to grow up into well-adjusted adults they need both parents in their lives promoting the virtues of good relationships and parenthood. The alternative is the role model is of feuding parents that treat children as possessions and not something the good lord gave to TWO people. I know what I prefer to teach my child … what do you chose? AC.

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