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This forum offers parents the opportunity to voice their own experiences of international parental child abduction, and related issues, and to share useful information with others in a similar situation.

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sent back under HC

by susan / Posted 03/02/2012 / Updated 09/01/2013

I was ordered back to Italy with my little 5 year old girl 14 months ago from the UK where I had fled an abusive ex partner, who still is abusive and more besides.

He went on to abduct her from my care for almost 5 months.

I donīt want to bore you all with the biased bureaucratic Italian legal and judicial system. But, suffice to say he wasnīt charged with anything even though he physically abused me. Protection orders donīt even exist here.

Iīve been forced to change lawyer 5 times. If you need legal aid like me, then you donīt het very goog legal counsel. You get messed around and they just waste a lot of time doing not very much.

At the custody hearing last September I wasnīt allowed to speak and only give answer questions. I was threatened into signing the custody agreement, by the judge, or he would have sent my daughter to foster care. I have seen many caes of this since. There were two conditions to the agreement that my ex father was able to put to the court!!

1. I must not leave the country with my little girl.

2. I must find a better place to live before 16 February, the next custody hearing or my daughter will be put to reside with her father.

In fact my ex partner has known all along that he would eventually may me pay for trying to leave him and taking our daughter to safety accusing him of Domestic Abuse. The ultimate revenge.

We are victims of Domestic Abuse, the Hague Convention and the Italian Judicial system.

10 years of direct abuse, 5 months like fugitives, 14 months hounded by our abuser. And in less than 2 weeks my this nightmare might get even worse. I have no friends, a very erratic teaching job, no childcare. Is there any hope at all?

Seriously, I want to know is there any justice in this world?

I wrongfully retained our daughter and was ordered back under HC. However, in Italy I donīt have any rights at all and am viewed as the guilty party because of what I did, not the ex. And they think the UK judge didnīt believe me so I was sent back. Most Italians, including lawyers ask me why I came back!! Several lawyers have strongly advised me to abscond again, asking for mercy from the judge saying we have no protection here.

I donīt know what to think anymore, who to write to, who to ask. No one wants to know, no one cares.


From ena / Posted: 23/04/2012
Hang n there, and go trough all the institutions. Ask and demand all help , legal aid u can get.Show evidence, show everything you have form that abuse. If its ongoing record EVERYTHING. FIGHT! The Hague Convention is so in human that it treats kids like things not human beings who needs their parent first then anything else.
From Phil / Posted: 05/05/2012
the law is an ass in most countiries unless you want to pay lawyers execesive amounts of money for doing very little.
It is they who have presided over a system which abuses the children ,so that they can make money from it.
There is no justice.
From Marie / Posted: 01/12/2012
I totally empathise. I have a similar case also here in Italy and would really love some contact with other mothers here. Why is it the innocent get punished? Youīre right in that nobody wants to know or cares, especially the authorities, but there are people out there, such as myself who DO care.

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